Close Encounters of a One Shot Kind
by iwantobemorethanwhoiam
Summary: A collection of unrelated one shots and ficlets. Please send me any prompts you might have! Rated T to be safe but most will be K.
1. Accidents and Blame

**A/N: Previously, I've posted all of my one shot/ficlets as separate stories but I'm gonna try to post them all together from now on and see how that works. **

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******Prompt from CastleFanficPrompts: Castle catches Beckett crying in the bathroom and she tells him its because she knows that he blames her for the car accident that killed their son. She blames herself too. Then she tells him she's pregnant.**

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Kate had taken a half day to pick their three-year old up from preschool since Castle was out-of-town on a book tour. They stopped at a stoplight and little Gavin was in the back seat just talking to himself and Kate was talking to Ryan on the phone, he was updating her on the suspect they had in interrogation.

When the light turned green, she pushed on the gas and proceeded through the intersection but didn't see the SUV speeding toward them from her right.

Next thing she knew, she was waking up in her upside down car. "Gavin!" No response. "Gavin, baby!" No response. She tried to maneuver herself so she could unbuckle and go to her son. "Mommy's here, I'm coming baby." Once she got herself unbuckled, she crawled into the back and was horrified by the sight. Her little boy hanging from his car seat. Still. So still. Blood rushing out of a gash on his forehead. She yelled for help through her tears, uncontrollable sobs that shake her entire body. She stroked a finger over his tiny hand, the other going in front of his mouth to feel for a breath. Nothing.

The paramedics arrive and Kate shields her little boy's face as they break the window to get to him. "He's not breathing." She managed to get out.

The paramedics tried to reassure her as they started taking Gavin out of his car seat and the car. Once he was out, they helped Kate out and tried to get her checked out but what mother would leave her son like that? She shook out of the paramedic's grip and raced toward the ambulance they brought Gavin to. She just watched blankly, through silent sobs, as they tried to revive him but when she heard one of them say, "time of death, 12:49pm," she lost it. She jumped in the ambulance and picked her son up. Sobbing as she cradled his limp body to her chest like her life depended on it, versions of "no," "not my baby," "I'm sorry," finding their ways out of her mouth.

Later they found out, the drive of the other car suffered a stroke behind the wheel.

(...)

It had been three months since the crash and things were just as hard as that day, a different kind of hard but hard nonetheless. Their marriage was slowly deteriorating before their eyes and neither knew how to fix it.

"Castle, I miss him too! You are not the only one hurting!"

"No! But I wasn't the one who brought this on! You were the one talking on your cell phone with our child in the back seat!"

She blames herself enough. She doesn't need him to remind her. "And you don't think I know that!? You don't think I go over that every second of every day!? I should have died in that crash not him!" And then she was retreating to their bedroom to deal with her grief alone, the way she's always handled death.

(...)

She's sitting on the floor of their en suite bathroom, clutching her knees to her chest, sobbing as she waits for the timer to beep on her phone. This can't be happening. They've barely spent two weeks in the same bed since the accident. This can't be happening. This cannot happen. Then her phone beeps and she has to face whatever the test says. She stands up, wiping at her eyes and takes a short step to the counter. A little blue plus sign is staring back at her and she drops to the floor again, her back leaning against the counter, sobs consuming her. She grabs Castle's shirt she slept in last night off the floor and shoves it in her mouth, not wanting Castle to hear her. She doesn't know how to tell him. But seconds later the door flies open then closes a little before it opens again.

"Kate? I thought you'd be at work."

She just hoped he'd go away and not notice the little white stick sitting above her head. But to her dismay, he does notice it. He takes a few steps in and picks it up, staring at it like he doesn't believe what he's seeing. She still doesn't meet his eye. "I'll...I'll make an appointment for this week."

"To make sure?"

She looks up at him, her brow furrowed. "No. To terminate."

He looks down at her, shock clear on his face. "Why would you do that?" He moves his eyes back to the test he still holds in his hands.

"How are we supposed to raise a child when you blame me for losing Gavin? You can barely look at me."

He know what she's saying is true, but he will not lose two children. He will not give up the opportunity to make things better with his wife. He sets the test back on the counter before sitting next to Kate and crossing his ankles together. "It's been a tough 6 months."

She chuckles at that. "That's the understatement of the year."

He turns to look at her and finds her already looking at him. "You're not going to terminate." She turns away from him and leans her head against the cabinets. "I think...it's easier when there's someone to blame." He waited for some sort of response but continues even though he doesn't get one. "I can't blame the guy with the medical problems and Ryan didn't know you were driving so the only logical person to blame was you." She nods at that. It was her fault, she should have paid more attention. He moves his hand to her chin, guiding it so she looks at him. "I'm sorry. I know you blame yourself too but you can't."

She turns away from him again and looks straight ahead. "We can't stay together just because I'm pregnant"

"No we can't." He says it almost matter-of-factly and it scares her that they won't stay together. "But we can try like hell." A soft smile plays across her lips as she looks back at him.


	2. Surprises and Cuddles

**A/N: Based on this photo: iwantobemorethanwhoiam tumblr com /post/ 94296038337**

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He had hoped he'd get home before naptime but as he gets in the town car, he knows he won't make it. A week away from them and another two hours might kill him. At least he'll get to see his wife.

When he starts unlocking the door to the loft, he expects to see Kate in the kitchen figuring out what to make for dinner or talking to Martha or reading on the couch but it's oddly quiet when he walks in. He ditches his suitcase by the door and goes upstairs to see if she was in Ava's room but nothing, not even a sleeping baby. He scans the upper floor but still no sign of his wife and child, not even his mother. He makes his way back down the stairs and this time, he heads toward his office to see if she put her down in the port-a-crib they keep in there but still nothing, he's starting to wonder if they're not even home. He proceeds to their bedroom and there they are, cuddled together on the bed, the little bunny Alexis gave them when Kate was pregnant nestled in Ava's hand, the pacifier in her mouth.

He smiles, making his way toward them but after a step, Kate turns toward him, shock written all over her face, and he smiles even wider. He wasn't supposed to come home for another day. He opens his mouth to say something but she puts her hand out and whispers a barely audible "Shh. She just got to sleep. Was up with a fever all night."

He goes to her side of the bed and kisses her before going around to his side, slowly climbing in next to her. He softly runs a hand down his little girl's back. He whispers, just as soft as Kate, "Sorry I wasn't here."

"You were working. And you're home a day early. Nothing to be sorry about."


	3. Sarah Grace and Miscarriages

**Prompt: After a fairly recent miscarriage, Kate and Rick are forced to re-evaluate things. More so when babysitting Sarah Grace triggers some pent up emotions from both of them.**

**Not babysitting but they are interacting with her.**

**I was going through all the fanfics I've written and I found this one that I haven't posted. I have no idea where the prompt came from, possibly CastleFanficPrompts?**

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It's the first time since the miscarriage that they have seen Sarah Grace and it's her first birthday party. Castle notices Kate sitting on the floor with the one year old, making faces, tickling her, letting her hold her fingers as she tries to walk. A year ago, Kate was so uncomfortable with kids, babies to be specific, but here with Sarah Grace, he can't help but think how amazing of a mother she almost was.

_Kate awoke to shooting pains coming from her abdomen, and immediately rested her hands on her 5 month pregnant belly. After an hour, the pain hadn't subsided and Kate finally relented and let Castle take her to the hospital. _

_They left the hospital the next day with one less family member. _

He was pulled from his thoughts when Sarah Grace stumbled into his legs. "Hey there birthday girl." He picked her up and blew a raspberry on her cheek. He saw Kate walking toward them as Sarah giggled. He could see the unshed tears in her eyes, knowing this was as tough for her as it was for him, probably even more so. As he was about to say something to comfort her, a few of Ryan's sisters came up to them, talking to them and the one year old. After a few minutes Castle gave Sarah away, grabbed Kate's hand and started walking toward the door.

She held back. "Castle, I'm fine." He gave her a stern look, one that said _no you're not, and you know you're not, _and she relented, following him out to the hallway.

They just looked at each other for a moment, Kate trying to keep it together, but seeing the tenderness in his eyes, it was impossible. She closed the distance between them, burying her face in his neck as his arms wrapped around her. He could feel her tears on his neck, her body shaking with sobs. She hadn't cried since the day at the hospital and he knew she needed this but, for her sake, he wished they were home.

Somehow, she managed to choke out, "I wanted our baby."

"I know." He rubbed a soothing hand up and down her back.

After a few minutes, Kate leaned away from him, wiping the tears from her face and his neck. "We should go back in there."

"Kate, we don't have to. They'll understand."

She sniffled and wiped at the corner of her eye again. "I know but I want to stay, we need to stay."


	4. Bruises and Nosebleeds

**A/N: Inspired by this picture: everlovingmind tumblr com/ post /94893706411**

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Two words was all it took for their whole world to start crashing down.

"It's cancer."

(...)

They had noticed an unusual amount of bruises on their four year old daughter. On her legs and arms, even some on her back. They talked to her preschool to see if kids were being mean to her or if she was just particularly clumsy lately but they hadn't noticed anything.

Then the nosebleeds and exhaustion started.

Bruises, nosebleeds and exhaustion. They couldn't help but think of the worst case scenario.

After hours of tests and what seemed like hundreds of questions their worst fear was confirmed.

(...)

When Kate heard those two words, she wrapped her arms tighter around Olivia, who was sitting in her lap, then rested her forehead on the top of her head, closing her eyes and willing the tears to stay where they belonged. Castle reached a hand over to them, resting it on Olivia's knee.

The doctor started talking about treatments and chemo and surgeries but Kate sensed Olivia getting nervous and scared so she left Castle to finish the conversation and they went to the car. Kate opened Netflix on her phone and let Olivia pick a show to watch while they waited for Castle.

She couldn't tear her eyes away from her little girl. She was sick, very sick and there wasn't anything she could do to take her potential pain away.

The only thing worse than having cancer is having a kid with cancer.

(...)

They spent the evening answering their daughter's questions and watching movies. No four year old should have to understand leukemia and chemo and radiation and bone marrow. Her childhood was taken in the blink of an eye.

Kate had done her best to keep it together and not let her daughter see how scared she was but the later it got, the harder it became. She let Castle put Olivia to bed and she went in their room and started changing into her pajamas, but she could only get her sweater off before the sobs took over and all she could do was crawl into bed and bury herself in the sheets and pillows, her body shaking as each sob escaped her lips.

It wasn't long before Castle returned and seeing her like this and knowing he was due for a good breakdown to, he rid himself of his shirt and pants and slowly climbed in behind her as tears started making their way down his face. He grazed his arm over her side but she didn't respond, her sobs just became harder. He rested his forehead against the back of her neck and they stayed like that for a few minutes, finally being able to be scared.

Kate turned toward him, her arms wrapping around his head, his around her shoulders. Finally when her sobs became softer and she was finally able to get some words out, "We can't let her die. She can't die."


End file.
